My garbage is here!!

Lads, my garbage has arrived after its harrowing journey through hurricane-ravaged Texas. Way to be a coastal state half covered in desert that's not prepared in any way for climate precarity. Good job, leaders of Texas, I trust you with my family's lives every day because they leave me no other choice.

You must be curious: Does the suspiciously gorgeous 5G iPod work?

No.

But! What it needs is simple (a fresh battery (which I possess) and a headphone jack rig (which I'm getting)) and even if the board is cooked I get:

-A like-new factory original click wheel
-A like-new factory original faceplate and backplate
-A like-new factory original screen
-ditto the chasis blah blah 

This more than justifies the $40 spend on the whole lot, especially when you consider that...

Two of the three other iPods I've tested so far are literally just fine.
The big shocker is the Nano. It's just normal and fine. It needed nothing, not even to be defibbed with a Firewire charge.Is the casing dingy? Yes, this is undeniable, but everything else is tip top. It holds charge and the whole bit. It talks to my Windows 10 (GRRRRR!!) computer without complaint. Lookit this!

It's even got somebody's old library on it, from 2013. I made the "Val" playlist myself just so I could have that little record of who owned it previously. And I am NOT deleting the birthday one! 

One of the 3 iPod Touch 2Gs I was so disgusted at receiving? Just works. I thought the Firewire was what breathed it to life when it wasn't charging, but I've learned that was a fluke and Touches don't GAF about the zap noodle. It did need to be kicked into Recovery and totally reset, which is a shame since I wanted to scrutinize its contents. But it did give me the chance to name it!

I've set it to shuffling the 500 tracks I jammed onto it with earbuds in ant Normal Listening Volume, and we'll see if battery drain is why it went to Da Bag.

Oh, Da Bag? These shits came to me, in the mail, in a convenience store plastic bag like unsolicited plums your elderly neighbor leaves on your porch. The packing situation was so wack that when I pulled the bag out, the little 3rd gen Shuffle that had been hiding in one of the folds got flang off to Jesus Knows Where and I have to trust it'll turn up one day.

The other Shuffles? Meh. Don't live if they're not plugged in, but I do want one for my collection so I'll keep the prettier one around. I don't need a finnicky thumb drive as an MP3 player, so I'm not super invested in repairing it. Not when I have a Nano with more storage and a SCREEN that's perfectly happy.

We will discuss the genero-nuggs next, maybe.